How to meet other teen lesbians or bisexuals
Thursday February 22, 2007
Dear KathyDear Nikki:
I’m a 15-year-old girl. I’m a lesbian, but I haven't told anyone yet (although I think my mother might suspect it). My parents, other family and friends are very gay friendly, so I don't think coming out would be a big problem for me. The issue is that I don't know how to get a girlfriend. I liked a lot of girls, but how to know if they are interested? I’m not really outgoing... and going to a lesbian bar is nothing like me (plus I’m way to young for that), so where can I meet other lesbians and how do I get in touch?
Signed,
Nikki
How great that you think your family will be okay with your being a lesbian. Since you're so sure they'll be okay, I suggest telling them before you start dating. At your age, it's very important that your parents know who you're going to be with, where you're going to be, who will be there too and when you'll be home. If you come out to them, they'll have reason to trust you and know you're not hiding stuff from them.
As for how do you get a girlfriend, now that is a whole other issue! Finding love is never simple, but the best way do it, is to put yourself out there. The more lesbian and bisexual teens you meet, the more likely it is you'll fall for one (or more) of them. Here are some tips on how to meet other lesbian and bisexual teens.
- If you decide to try and meet someone on the internet, Be sure to follow these internet safety tips especially for lesbian/bisexual teenagers.
- Read this before coming out to your parents.


just try and talk too some of your girl friends and see if they are bi or gay oor if they no anyone who is and who is availible. its the wway i met people
i am a lesbian but i only want a cyber realationship i am 11 i have red hair and green eyes and i am not afraid of sex but i want love first
i am lesbian and i am almost 16. ive had no issues in my friends being accepting, but my parents are another story. they say they still love me, but i doubt it. as for dating, i need help in asking the girl to go out. never done that before and i wanna do it right.
Hey nikki im 13 and im afraid
to tell my mom im bi.
i do like girls
but i dunno how to
get in touch with em/
I am bisexual; I am pretty proud of it, tell your friends. If they were really your friends they wouldn’t care…Juss be yourself around girls you like…
im attracted to girls. but im straight but i lov gurls breast and butts and everything bout females. but ion knw how to tlk to one. im 14 and im not scared to have sex with girls but i jus want to find love first
im 16 gay and i live in the uk but i carnt find no one who is a lesbian where i live lol
my family are cool with it but not many my mates no and they are all straight can anyone help me please
i am the same i am 14 i am a lesbian but i havnt told my parent some of my brothers friends no and so does he but i dont think they do you think if i meet someone and then tell them it will be easier or should i telll them first
To all the young teenage girls out there:
Hi. My name is Lauren…I’m 18, and I’ve been out for 3 years. I am the founder and leader of my local Tolerance Alliance and I’ve worked with queer youth for a long time on coming out and self-acceptance.
I’ve been where most of you girls have been and I know what it feels like to be scared and most of all, confused. I came out to my Southern Baptist family little at a time, but the process is different for everyone. I write a blog about my coming-out experience and my journey through young lesbianhood. If you’re looking for someone out there who looks a lot like you, I’m here and I’m writing to you:
lifeunderage.blogspot.com
I always respond to comments from young girls (mainly because I know what it feels like to want to talk to someone). I’ve chronicled nearly everything that I’ve learned about coming out, being brave, starting a relationship, working through a relationship, ending a relationship, and everything in between. If you have any questions or just want a friend in the lonely world of being a queer youth, please stop by. I’d love you hear from you and I’d love for you to hear what I have to say as well.
None of you are alone…there are so many more like us out there, we just have to discover each other.
-Lauren
wow, christy youre 11?
oh my goodness where are you getting these love and sex ideas…
you are way to young for that….
youre not going to find other gay teens until youre at least like 15 or 16
slow it down there tiger
hello lauren
im onna say it. ima lesbian. im only twelve, but im proud of who i am. im scared of telling my parents cuz they are homophobes,and im scared they wont love me. My freinds know, and they still accept me. im not looking for a gf becouse i know i wont find one till im like 15. but i needed to tell the world that. any tips obout telling my family?
heyy my name is stephina im 18 and i been goiong back and forth with me likin girls like i been trying the whole god thing for a while and its good like i use to be bi and be in relationships with girls and then i stopped now i have a boyfriend but now its lik idk if i jus like boys or girls cus im tryin to be closer to god but girls i like them alot maybe its a sexual thing cus i love breasts and im always starin at a girls butt i dont know wat to do at all
I’m 12 years old and I told my mom I’m a lesbian, she’s fine with it, but there’s no way I could find my dad. I’m sick of all the girls online either being too old or just wanting sex, I want a relationship. Christy, I know you don’t want to hear it, but you will want to wait for sex. I want to meet a nice girl, but the people in my town are very close-minded so I don’t know how to tell them.
yo, im 14 almost 15 i am pretty sure i am bi but i am not really sure, i want to date grls but i don’t know how to meet them, i don’t really want to come out to my parents or friends until i am sure, i need some advice!
Well im 19, and I have the exact same problem as Sarah, but I know my friends would accept me without a problem, but my family is another thing, and I dont want to come out until im totally sure, but I want to meet some girls to be sure I am bi.
well i am 15 nd i been out for abt nine months nd had to girlfriends i like to be wit older girls becuz they dnt have as much drama den the younger ones so if anyone wants to chat let me know and we can chat on email!!!
Hi i’m 19, I’m bi, my best friend knows and she is fine with it. I told my mother a few months ago, and she hit the roof big time! I knew she wouldnt like it, but I thought I might be wrong. I wasnt! She warned me not to tel my dad. I dont know any other bi girls, but I would like to meet some, so I have people to talk to.
Lozzie
Hi I’m Steph. I’m a lesbian. and 15. Im not out except to my parents and my one friend and her mom. I told my friend 2 years ago and i thought she was ok with i knew she didnt like talkin bout it so i didnt and 4 months ago i found out she wasnt comfortable with it at all. we havent talked since and she is my neighbor so we cant help but run into eachother. I cried my self to sleep for the longest time b/c i thought that she might be my only true friend and now that were not talkin i dont know who is my true friends. almost everyone in my school is a homophobe including my really close friends. i live in a religious area and we dont have any GSAs or other support groups around us. MY parents are alright bout it. my mom doesnt talk to me bout it and my dad only talks bout the sexual aspects of it and im not interested in the sexual aspect yet. i just want someone who understands what im goin through and someone that will hold me when i need to be held. So anyways yea everyday is a struggle. all i hear in school is gay bashing and stuff and it hurts. my friend even compared gay marriage to marrying ur cat. and that pissed me off but she doesnt know. i correct my friends and the kids i babysit when they use gay in place of the word stupid.
I just want a place to talk to people who understand what im goin through
i thin i mite be gay im 13 years old but i want t meet a girl i have but they live way to far how an i meet one in my area
Hey, im 15 and i’ve known that im gay for just over a year: and have just came out to all of my mates this week. They were all very accepting. Im not telling my family im gay unless i find someone. but its good you have no probs tellin your family as u think they will be fine. Im like you; i want a girlfriend. But have no idea how to find one lol
Hey asia, Im 14 but really mature and would love to talk. I recently came out to my friends that I was a lesbian but I don’t know anyone else who is. And I really want a girlfriend who’s there for you
Hey asia, I’m 14 and would really love to talk to you. I recently came out to my friends that I was a lesbian and want a girlfriend, but I don’t have any lesbian friends.