Kathy Belge: I think lesbians have a hard time dating. I think when you get two women together, the natural tendency is to nest.Jackie Warner: God, yes! The emotions are quite intense and fast. And it’s hard for women to have sex and not bond emotionally. It’s near impossible. So what happens a lot of times is a one night stand that should never go past a one night stand can sometimes turn into a relationship.
Truthfully, that’s what happened with Mimi and I. I was in a place where I was rebounding, 10 days single from my six and a half year relationship, and no disrespect to Mimi, but it was so inappropriate and so wrong. Something was off in me. So what should have been a casual fling turned into a tumultuous relationship that nobody was happy in. I think lesbians do that more than they want to admit.
I joke all the time with my straight girlfriends when they say, “Maybe I need to be a lesbian,” I say, “Oh, no!” The grass is not greener on our side. But I wouldn’t give it up for a million years because there is nothing more connected and more beautiful than two women together
You want to stay single now?Absolutely. I’ve got work to do. In this show, you’ll see, it’s very much about growth. I’m very raw and I’m also very honest about where I’m at. I’m in therapy and they’re highly personal sessions. You’re going to see that people can have a lot of things together in their lives and be hyper perfectionist and controlling in some aspects, but we’re all works in progress. And with me, I have to really focus on why I can’t make my interpersonal love relationships work, or why I choose the wrong people. It’s really about that for me. I’ve got a lot to work on that so I can attract the mate that I want to.
That sounds like work that a lot of us are doing, but what’s it like to do that on TV. When I saw you were going to have your therapy sessions filmed, I gasped.I know. Those are the days, the therapy days, I’m going to admit to you, I was just furious. I was not nice to the crew on those days. People avoided me on those days because I was angry. I chose to do it. The anger is probably more directed at myself for making that choice, but it was so deeply personal and intrusive.
I was raised with a mentally ill parent and I made a conscious effort to expose that and to expose therapy because I think it’s tremendous for people. I think my relationship issues and why I choose these mates is very relatable to people. I think a lot of people make [dumb] choices, even though they’re high achievers in other areas of their lives. I hear it over and over.
Do you have much say over what gets aired?I have a lot of trust, but I also have a say. I’m in endless meetings with the producers to discuss the show. I’ve seen the first couple of episodes. Am I critical of it? Yeah. Mostly, though it’s about looks. Oh, my god, I look exhausted and stressed., like I’m going through some serious stuff. I think that’s going to be very evident in the first [episodes.] It’s showing all over me that I’m going through the ringer. That’s what disturbs me more than the content of the show. Do I have ultimate control over what hits the cutting room floor? No. But do I have the ear of the executive producer, constantly discussing these issues and what should and shouldn’t be aired. Yes. That’s how I prefer to do it because if I had my druthers, I would cut everything. But you have to have a show out of something.
People have to understand this is a TV show. Do I want to hang out with my trainers 24/7? No. But, because the show is about that, I do. That would be the only circumstance that’s a little odd. I don’t hang out with my staff normally.