Some people assume that once you’re in a good and healthy relationship, that your sex life will remain great through out the relationship. Our sexual connection, like other aspects of our relationships will normally ebb and flow. There will be times when you’re all over each other and time when your passion will decrease. Want to keep your sex life alive and vibrant, here are some things to avoid.
Togetherness is good, but one pattern lesbian couples often fall into is spending too much time together. There’s an old saying “absence makes the heart grow fonder.” Take time away from each other and develop your own interests. Better yourself as a person. Give her reasons to continually find you stimulating.
While some time away is good, don’t go overboard and get too distant. Be sure to make time for each other at least once a week. Plan
date nights. Beware of falling into the routine of coming home, turning on the TV or computer and zoning out from each other.
Okay, this might sound obvious, but if you don’t ever have sex, you’re not going to have a sex life. Make sex dates. Say yes to sex, even if you’re tired, have a headache or don’t feel in the mood from time to time. You might surprise yourself at how quickly you get in the mood or how the pleasure of that orgasm suddenly makes your headache go away.
4. Let body image issues get in the way
You may have put on a few pounds, grown a few grey hairs, added some wrinkles and aren’t feeling as sexy as you once did when you were younger. People can and do have healthy sex lives no matter their size, age or physical ability.Routines are good for some thing, like getting your children ready for school and synchronized swimming, but in the bedroom a routine can make your sex life boring. Don’t’ be afraid to try new positions, new activities, new toys, new dirty talk, erotica or fantasies.
Although lesbians are at risk for sexually transmitted diseases like herpes, HPV and HIV, there seems to be less attention paid by lesbians to safer sex than in the gay male and heterosexual communities. A STD can not only kill your sex life, it can kill you. Protect yourself!
More: Safe sex for monogamous couples.
