- Decide if you want to present her with a ring. It's not necessary to propose, but it is traditional to present her with a ring when you propose. If you do want to present her with a ring, here are tips for picking out a lesbian engagement ring.
Decide where you want to ask her. On vacation? In your home? A favorite restaurant or a romantic beach? The place of your first date?
Plan for location. Are you going to take her on a picnic? Be sure to pack all her favorite foods. If it's a restaurant, plan ahead and get the wait staff involved.
Decide how you want to say it. If you're going to ask her to marry you, you might want to prepare a little something to say about when you knew she was the "one," why you want to spend the rest of your life with her or even write her a poem. If you're the musical type, write her a song proposal. She'll certainly never forget that!
Decide when you want to ask her. Your anniversary? Christmas? Gay pride weekend? Her birthday? Start getting ready at least a month beforehand.
Get your friends involved if they can help facilitate the process. They'll want to be involved. Friends can help pick out her ring, set up the place you plan to ask, get the DJ to play your song. If having assistance will make it go smoother, do ask!
Do it! Look her in the eye and ask her to marry you. You know yourself and your girlfriend better than anyone. Just speak from your heart, tell her how you feel about her and why you want to be with her for the rest of your life. Bear your heart and soul to her.
Listen. If you're lucky she'll say yes, but she may have something else in mind. She might not be ready. If she needs time to think about it, give her that.
Celebrate. If she says yes, it's time to start planning your lesbian wedding.
- Try something fun. A friend of mine proposed by putting a ring in a sushi roll. Another had a friend set up a picnic off one of their favorite hikes and asked her there.
- Try something romantic. Bring flowers and chocolate. Go to a nice restaurant. Write your proposal in the sand.
- Try something unique. Slip a note in her favorite bag of candy. Rent a billboard she drives by on the way to work. Have the announcer do it at an NBA game. (I've seen plenty of straight proposals this way, but never a lesbian one!)
- Keep your sense of humor. If you get too serious, she'll freak out and think something is wrong.
What You Need
- Ring - if you're presenting her with one.
- An open heart.