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Share Your Story: How did you come out to your parents?

By her angel

How did you come out to your parents?

Well...mines not a happy or positive story unfortunately. It was face to face and not by my choice.

What did you say?

My mom, an extremely religious woman, caught me and my, at the time, girlfriend, making out in the basement while attempting to watch a movie. Maggie said she heard the door upstairs open but I didn't believe her. She wouldn't let it go so I got up and checked the stairwell. No one was in sight. We went back to making out until the movie was over. We went upstairs so I could take her home and my mom was in the kitchen cooking. She wouldn't even look at us. She told me it was time to take Maggie home so I told her that was what I was doing. Once Maggie and I were in the car she started freaking out saying that my mom knew and that it was all over. I calmed her down telling her that there was no way and that she had nothing to worry about. So months went by without my mom saying anything about it. Both Maggie and I were convinced everything was fine and that we had nothing to worry about. Well, basketball season was almost over and my team was playing for the chance to go to state. We lost the game so everyone was a mess as we walked out of the locker room to go home and there Maggie was with my bag waiting for me to be able to go to the bus. I start heading out and my mom takes my pillow from my arms and walks away. I ask if somethings wrong and all she'll say is that I know whats wrong. I get my stuff from the bus and give Maggie a hug before I get off. I get in my parents car and they take me to where they're staying. They go through the night acting like nothing was wrong so I was completely confused. Once I was about to go to bed my parents said they wanted to talk to me. I sat down in the living room area while my mom told me what she saw. I told her I didn't know what to tell her and all they could say was that I wasn't allowed to see her ever again. It tore me apart. Maggie and I snuck around after that to see each other but once we were caught for the last time her mom sent her to Arizona to live with an Uncle. She came back with a restraining order saying she never wanted anything to do with me in the first place and that I needed to leave her alone. That tore me to pieces. Now, two years later, I'm still trying to deal with the whole situation.


  • My advice for people trying to decide how to come out, especially to parents extremely religious, don't wait to get caught. If you know that that's who you are, then tell them! Tell them that it's who you are, and that you hope they'll stay along with you for the ride because you'll need them. I wish you the best of luck!

Kathy Belge, About.com Lesbian Life, says:

Wow, what a hard story. Thanks for sharing. I hope you continue to heal.

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