How did you come out to your parents?
I came out to my parents at 19 on New Years day. I decided to do it because my New Year's resolution was to be more myself and quit hiding who I am from everyone (not just by being a lesbian but a lot of other things too). My girlfriend knew I wanted to do it soon, since I wanted their support, but I was always too scared. She finally convinced me to just say it, so after shopping with my parents all day, I finally just told everyone to go sit in the living room because I had something important to talk about.
What did you say?
Well, we had been discussing living arrangements because I was moving in with my girlfriend and her roommate (plus basically her boyfriend since they're inseparable) due to how much cheaper it is to live in an apartment than in a college dorm (like $700 a month cheaper!). My mother kept asking me what I would do if my girlfriend (though she called her my her name) got a boyfriend. At the meeting I explained to them that it would be quite impossible for her to get a boyfriend because she was dating me*.
My parents handled it well. My father was uncomfortable with the idea (he's rather homophobic), but my mother didn't care. She had several gay friends already, so homosexuality didn't bother her. In all truth they stated that they kind of already knew. The only question they asked were if I had always known this or if I had chosen it.
*(We've known each other our entire lives. We love each other very much and are discussing marriage...if it ever becomes legal. It is doubtful we break up unless something tremendously bad happens. I had to explain that to my parents.)
Advice
- Know your parents - it'll make things a lot easier if you know their stance on homosexuality. Don't tell your parents if they will react badly or abusively. If they are supporting you, it may be best to tell them after you can support yourself (only if you know they'll react badly though).
- Be calm. Your parents love you. It may take time for them to understand, but in the end they just want you to be happy.
- Have a support group. They will make you feel a lot better about the process.
- Celebrate. You've done something extremely brave, so reward yourself.
- If you're ready, just do it.
