How did you come out to your parents?
I've always liked girls. When I was younger, however, I was hazy on the other things that. Did I like boys, as well? What should I classify myself as? I didn't know these things, but didn't focus too hard on them. I was still trying to fully understand my sexuality when I was outed by a friend. I never had the chance to sit down with my mom and explain things. My best friend at the time came over to my house while I was out with my ex girlfriend. Feeling jealous about me spending time with someone other than her, she told my mom. When she later entered a relationship with my brother, she told him as well.
What did you say?
I didn't really get to say much. My mom never told me she knew, but when I got home that night, she had a very cold attitude and refused to talk to me. A couple months after that, we moved. My brother told me he knew, and how he knew, and that he was okay with it. We became closer as a result of that. My mom would hear us laughing and joking around, and her attitude became cold once again. She stopped speaking to me. There was a solid month of my mom talking to me only when necessary, and when she did talk to me, it wasn't very friendly. I broke down. My mom was all I had, my best friend. I thought I'd be able to go to her for anything, no matter what. All I remember is walking into her room, crawling in bed with her, and crying. I just remember saying, "I'm so sorry" over and over.She told me she accepted it and would tease, "As long as whoever you end up with is pretty, I'm fine with it," but she still shut me out. Our relationship wasn't what it used to be. She confronted me and told me she thought I was doing it for attention, to be controversial. It took a very, very long time, but we got through it. My brother and I are as close as ever, my mom and I still argue, but my sexuality is never a part of it. We're closer because of everything we've been through, and I appreciate the fact that she eventually came around to accepting it. I know things could have ended very badly if she hadn't, especially as she is my only parent, and quite literally, all I have left.
Advice
- It's wise to tell your loved ones. Before someone else does, or before they have to see it for themselves.Understand that it will, most likely, take time. I endured a month of my mother not speaking to me, but after that, things were better. Listen to what they have to say, even if you don't necessarily agree. Above all, be respectful. If things lead to shouting and screaming, things could end on bad terms, and that's not something you want.
