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Readers Respond: Butches, Do You Like to be Touched Sexually?

Responses: 144


It's more of a fear

I don't lable myself. But I don't like to be touched and I don't like to touch my gf. We hug ang make out but when ever she trys to take it futher I chicken out. I think it's more of a fear than anything else. I want to please her but I can't. She still can't keep her hands off of me!

She's opened up.

My girlfriend and I have been together for over a year, when we first got together she was awkward when it came to her being the receiver. She wouldn't finish and she would always try to change it to her pleasing me. I would say my girlfriend is a soft butch. Maybe? After some time of being together she opened up about how she felt. It took some time but now she is extremely comfortable with me pleasing her, she finishes and I am proud to say I'm the first person to use a toy on her. I think it really depends on the couple and the way they feel with eachother. She still favors pleasing me but she has no problem letting me touch her.

Its about trust

I don't like labels, but I would say that I am somewhat boyish in the way I dress and act. However, even though I don't have the typical girly appearance and personality, I still consider myself to have a feminine sensitivity and tenderness. Anyway, I don't have a control complex, but I get really turned on when I please my partner. However, none of the 4 people I've been with intimately (both girls and guys) have made me orgasm, and I never really liked/ felt comfortable with them touching me. I wonder if I just haven't found the right person yet, or the right way to be touched, but its really affected my current relationship. I think it just boils down to a trust/ self-worth issue for me. I can't say I've truly given all of myself to anyone, and I just always put other people's needs before my own.
—Guest A

My Stud x3

my Stud.. iDk if She Likes To Be Touched. But i Don't think She Wants it. Whenever i Point Out Her ( Girl Parts ], She Gets Mad. She Really Plays The Stud/Butch Role. She is The Dominant One in The Relationship. & Because of Her Reaction When i Point Out the Obvious ( that She is Still Technically A Female ] She Gets Mad, So i Am Nervous to Ask if She Wants to Be Touched too. "/
—Guest AmandaMayeInspire

My Girlfriend

My girlfriend is a softbutch, she has a short hair cut, and dresses "guyish". I'm totally a girly tomboy. My gf loves to be touched, we do so much together, and we enjoy it all together. (:
—Guest BG.

My stud loves to be touched

I am the very femme one and my gf is a baby faced stud and she loves to be touched in all the places i do when were alone and under the sheets we have fun with each other we used our bodies to please each other first it made us closer and more comfortable and now she wants to bring in the toys.... but once she is out of the bed room its back to her dominance because she knows that me F***ing her too doesnt take her dominance away
—Guest lilKrys

I wish

I cannot stand to have my chest touched. I don't take my shirt off during sex, as it dissuades people from trying. I'd say that I wish I was better at letting myself be touched (elsewhere, too), but it feels too emasculating.
—Guest Andy

Touch vs In Control

I never used to allow my previous gf's to touch me (I was super stone butch) but now I've changed my mind about being touched. Being touched is the most beautiful feeling one can ever experience and why should one deprive oneself of such a feeling? The only thing that disturbes me now is that I feel like I'm becoming softer. I love being in control and tough. For me now it's about pleasing each other so yeah baby, you're femme I'm butch but let's touch each other all night long, I'll deal with my ego later.
—Guest muzicaldez

touching her

i recently had sex for the first time with my butch gf and she touched me the entire time when i tried doing something she just did something else im unsure what it means if she dosent want me to touch her or she just wants to please me i enjoyed it very much but i wish i could do something to so she can feel satisfied
—Guest aniri439

Stud wit a Soft Hidden Side

Ok so here's the thing I'm a very very very dominate stud and I'm very much into pleasing my femme I do use straps/ toys and I also can be intimate without them I expect to do everything with a female let me explore ur entire body and make u reach multiple climaxes! But when it comes to u touchin me? U will be lucky if u get ur hands on my boobs cuz usually I won't let a femme even do that I'm 23 yrs old and have been in many relationships since the age of 16 and me being a gold star (virgin) I take a while to let sumone get past those walls.... I've been the receiver to only 2 women and loved it ! But those 2 women were long term relationships and I was in love and cared deeply for each one, so I'm not sayin a femme can't touch me or I don't like bein touched I love it! But if we meet at a club n u want to get freaky back at my pad lay back and enjoy tonight u will be my pillow queen :)
—Guest CaLi StUd

"That's okay, too."

I'm basically the epitome of femme and my girlfriend is butch and considers herself basically a guy (though she still can pull off looking androgynous...she looks a lot like Shane from The L Word)--I asked her this question flat out and she said "Whatever you want". Of course, I wanted a more specific answer, so after some pouting, I got the answer "I like being in control and it's more comfortable for me to do things to YOU, but if you want to touch me...that's okay, too." I think she was just being considerate =P We do this thing were we lie side-by-side and rub against each other's legs, and she said she likes that because she can thrust herself against me instead of me doing it to her. But when it comes to hand jobs or oral, she doesn't like me doing that to her at all; she's the one all over me instead. But that's okay with me too ;)
—Guest Marie

Touch me all you like!

If i had to label myself (I prefer not to) i'd say that i was a soft butch but alot of people get that wrong by my apperance. BUT i can assure you once i get inbetween the sheets i let my gf go wild and vice versa. I like to make sure both me and my partner have an amazing time. After all we are only human and weither you are stone-butch or extremely femme i think deep down (literally) we all liked to be touched. It not only brings great pleasure but it gives you a sense of security and love. Sex is natural!! Let your partner touch you when you are having some alone time. After all you can still keep your butch look when you come out the bedroom.
—Guest Caroline Morrison

butches that don't like to be touch

very interesting topic loving the responses, very interesting. well my first gf was a dominate stud, to all the studs that don't like being touched it very very boring, what you don't like someone else will. My current stud gf loves being touched, she is a giver and receiver. I hate being label pillow queen. lesson learned, never will i ever be involved with a stud that is only a giver....
—Guest daisy


I am what you would call a soft butch i guess but i pretty much dress like a masculine and have a short hair cut and my girl well dress a lil femmer and has long hair but we do EVERYTHING to each other, thats how i like it. i mean when it comes down to it we are still women and well it still feels good to be touched

touch with purpose, yes

Of course I love to be touched and not exactly light, I like it rough but with a goal, to satisfy my desire. If not, better untouched. The same for licking, stroking, etc. I am more like a soft butch, looking tough but in a sexy way.

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