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Please help, I need some advice about trimming. I am in my first lesbian relationship and haven't had sex with my partner yet. Is there any set rules about trimming? I want to know what's good and what's not. A friend of mine was talking about an ex of hers the other day and was discussing going down and said, “And she didn't trim, it really put me off.” There are obviously rules that I am unaware of! Help!
Rules? What rules? Every lesbian is different. Here are my thoughts on shaving. What about you? Do you shave? Take the Lesbian Life Poll.
Comments
May 7, 2007 at 5:32 pm
(1) sapphist says:

I have to respectfully disagree with our guide. I have always considered it proper lesbian etiquitte to at least trim the area prior to allowing someone to go down on you. Further, any woman I have ever slept with and every friend I have had this conversation with agrees! Better to be safe than sorry!

May 7, 2007 at 6:17 pm
(2) Thirtysomething Lesbian says:

My experience is similar to our guide’s experience. My girlfriend keeps her hair closely cropped. I have horrible itching if I do more than keep the bikini line trimmed so I go natural. Having witnessed my difficulty, my girlfriend simply says, “Do what works for you.” Anatomy plays a role. Her labia majora meet and cover her. My labia do not; they are more parted thus my discomfort when I shave away my “protection.” BTW, I don’t suggest cycling post-shave.

May 7, 2007 at 9:46 pm
(3) bald and beautiful says:

Whatever floats your boat, but when one is fully shaved, you can feel absolutely everything, so it is much more of a sensory experience, not confined to the obvious area. Once you shave fully on a regular basis, the discomfort everyone that doesn’t shave complains about goes away. And it is a much cleaner experience as well. And I am a 40-something gal. Age means nothing on this preference.

May 8, 2007 at 9:39 am
(4) MC says:

I and my partner get waxed, yup the whole enchiallada, brazillian. I use to be a trimmer/shaver and although that senitive feeling is enhanced, getting waxed enhances it 100% more.

As far a pain goes its not that bad. You can by an over the counter cream you put on about an hour before you go and it totally numbs it. But if you dont use it its not that bad. Its very quick. Warning..do not get it done right before you period, you are too sensitive then, go just after.

For the ingrowns which arent bad at all, get this stuff called Tend Skin works like a charm.

Ya I have gotten flack from other lesbians about not having bush confidence, but i really dont care. It feels great, really clean and oh so soft.

In the end do what makes you feel comfortable, a trim around is always a nice thing to do, besides that last thing you need to think about during your first time is if your hair is too long. Be safe and just have fun!!

May 8, 2007 at 2:31 pm
(5) jen says:

i trim mine and my wife trims hers. sorry but EVERYONE i know agrees the natural outta control granola bush is for the ones that go to the bohemian women festivals.

May 9, 2007 at 10:31 am
(6) EO says:

Ill say one thing…for her to mention she was put off by un trimmed hair…tells you you should trim…or wax…or get it styled, some nail salons have specialist who do it.

personally i dont like to shave or completely wax all of it…sorry ladies…i also dont like it if someone else does, it would be like going down on a 12 year old. but to let it grow free is not sexy..at all

May 9, 2007 at 11:50 am
(7) Vaframenti says:

My partner and I trim. Have a cheap electric trimmer for the job (head shaver thing). Quick and easy. I find I get itchy if I don’t, especially cycling and kayaking. I do prefer my partner “trimmed;” easier navigation! LOL! It would ALWAYS be my partners comfort choice though.

May 10, 2007 at 9:37 am
(8) terri says:

definately trim its a turn off to have hair there for munching

May 10, 2007 at 11:51 am
(9) Wendy says:

It’s totally a matter of what YOU like. both my partner and I are smooth, and we often make it part of our special time together to do each other. Nothing is more intimate or erotic!

Before she and I got together I varied between trimmed and shaved, depending on mood or whim at the time and most of the girls I dated at least trimmed. What matters is how you feel about yourself and what your prefer and if the girl you are with is more worried about your pubic area than the rest of you, maybe she’s not the right one for you.

May 10, 2007 at 10:09 pm
(10) Lulu says:

I agree that totally clean is too much like being with a minor.
I wax the bikini area and trim the rest. Nice and neat

May 11, 2007 at 6:01 am
(11) Kanta says:

I trim my self and my wife is completly shaved. Its upto yoy what u like and what you feel better for you.

December 11, 2008 at 11:37 am
(12) Dr. Ron Gerughty says:

If a straight male who has studied and worked with thousands of women for over 50 years and who is currently writing a book on woman’s sexuality, may provide a comment for consideration, I offer the following. I certainly do agree that shaving is a personal preference, one that is inviolate. A factor to consider though, is that pubic hair serves a significant purpose beyond protection and that is that it traps and holds pheromones secreted by the vulvovaginal glands providing a wonderful aphrodisiac. Without your hair, it dissipates…just food for thought.

December 11, 2008 at 3:54 pm
(13) Dr. Catherine says:

Dear Dr. Gerughyt,

As a doctor of psychology and a lesbian who has worked with and gone down on women for over thirty years, I must say how lovely it is to see a straight male studying women and providing us lesbians with factors to consider about women’s pubic hair. Thank you also for pointing out that the vagina has certain aroma that you find alluring — we’re lesbians. We have vaginas and have spent quite some time studying other women’s vaginas….we already know that a vagina and pubic hair hold particular scents. If this is a new fact that you found from studying women then kudos to you – I’m not sure that this is the best place to express your findings and in fact it is rather intrusive and a bit creepy. I would like to hear lesbian’s opinions on this issue.

December 12, 2008 at 12:41 am
(14) Salabra says:

My partner and I are both bald – we simply enjoy the sensations.

However, you asked advice as a first-timer – I would opine that it’s very much a matter of what YOU think you’d enjoy.

Many people, especially in the US, have a problem with total baldness, because it seems somehow paedophilic in nature – and, as you see, lesbians are not immune from this consideration. Once again, it seems to me that this is a matter of one’s personal ethical viewpoint – *I* regard it as a cultural quirk; I would imagine, for example, that many “anti-baldness” lesbians in the Anglosphere would shave their legs and under their arms (even though underarm hair is also a source of pheromones).

Just some thoughts.

Sal

December 12, 2008 at 2:18 am
(15) Sylvia Rodrigue says:

I agree with the guide. It is a matter of personal preferance. Myself and my wife use hair remover creams after our periods. Ofcourse, we have very little pubic hair. Being soft & clean down there is a sure “turn on” for us.

December 12, 2008 at 9:21 am
(16) Marjorie says:

I agree that keeping yourself well taken care of is great, it may not be for everyone but it’s so nice to be shaved and soft it works well for me and my partner I have never been much of a hair person except for the long hair on my head.

December 15, 2008 at 3:07 am
(17) Alessandra says:

Though it is a matter of individual preferance, personal hygene is important. I remove my hair, though I have very little, using Anne French once in a month. My partner initially resisted. But slowly I could convince her without putting any pressure. Now both of us enjoy the softness and cleanliness. Its great.

December 18, 2008 at 12:20 pm
(18) Dr. Ron Gerughty says:

Dr.Catherine says:
“If this is a new fact that you found from studying women then kudos to you – I’m not sure that this is the best place to express your findings and in fact it is rather intrusive and a bit creepy. I would like to hear lesbian’s opinions on this issue.”

I do want to apologize then for the intrusion, forgive me. I have been studying all aspects of woman’s sexuality, inclusive of lesbianism, for over a half a century and I try to follow this blog, as well as many others, to learn more so that I gain a better understanding of and appreciation for woman’s innate sexual behaviors. I shall refrain though from commenting hereon out, as I see your point concerning the intrusion, especially since I haven’t been invited. I will just continue to read what you all have to say and trust I can gain additional insight. I have talked extensively with several hundred woman over the years who have told us they are lesbian, but must confess that this hardly makes me an expert. I feel that I need much more of an education and will strive to accomplish that goal.

December 18, 2008 at 10:44 pm
(19) Angele - Surgeon says:

“…so that I gain a better understanding of and appreciation for woman’s innate sexual behaviors. I shall refrain though from commenting hereon out, as I see your point concerning the intrusion, especially since I haven’t been invited. I will just continue to read what you all have to say and trust I can gain additional insight. ”

I still find that creepy, no offense. Although, you sound like the average man by reading a blog meant for lesbians. I agree with Dr. Catherine.

To answer the poll – I trim. My ex girlfriend did the same. I think it is entirely a personal decision.

December 19, 2008 at 3:32 am
(20) jamie says:

Dr. Catherine
Your response to Dr. Ron Gerughty was rude and done to degrade men and to put them in their place.Just because you’re a dyke, doesn’t mean men can not comment on gay issues.Please take your ego somewhere else.

December 19, 2008 at 4:10 pm
(21) jessie says:

hi i read that someone wants to know about shaving down there. well i am 20 and i am a lesbian, i dont shave down there but i do trim. i feel that having some hair is a sign of maturity. i guess women think they have to shave, because thats the thing now and days. but its really up to you and your partner. you can always ask her how she feels about having hair down there. i know i dont mind.

December 20, 2008 at 5:03 pm
(22) LeStranger says:

I appreciate Dr. Ron Gerughty’s input and wish him to remain as a valued member of our forum. Please reconsider, Dr. Gerughty. It is Dr. Catherine who should refrain.

February 28, 2009 at 12:51 pm
(23) Quinn says:

I agree with the few others before me, I appreciate your comment, Dr. Ron Gerughty, and that you are trying to learn more “aspects of woman’s sexuality, inclusive of lesbianism”.

How else are you supposed to learn? A first hand encounter seems like a great way and a perfectly fine idea with me. I wish a lot of my guy friends would take initiative like you have here. It seems as though those who disagree are judging you based upon their opinions of other men and not purely on your interest in something you’d like to know more about.

I’m sure you have something to offer us, not every woman knew the input you’ve added here. I know I surely didn’t.

July 19, 2009 at 3:26 pm
(24) Dfoot says:

Both myself and my partner trim. I personally like short trimmed not shaved. I don’t however like a natural bush.

July 28, 2009 at 7:51 pm
(25) Bon says:

I have never shaved and neither has any woman I’ve been with. I know that sounds odd but having hair down there is natural and serves several purposes. Hair helps carry sweat away from your pores. Being an athlete I would be concerned about rashes if I shaved. Well, trimming is fine and I did have a lover who used to do that to avoid hairs coming out of her bathing suit. But the hair doesn’t really get in the way if you know what you are doing. I can understand that maybe hairless is more sensual for some people but then you are committed to shaving all the time. I agree with personal preference. I just don’t appreciate negative comments about the natural appearance.

October 16, 2009 at 11:45 am
(26) Sam says:

It is personal preference. My wife and I shave each other which adds to our intimacy and we both enjoy the sensitivity down there during sex.

November 3, 2009 at 1:57 pm
(27) wowza says:

I do think the man commenting is creepy. The question was asking lesbians whether or not they shave. Last time I checked it is impossible for men to be lesbians. I wouldn’t be able to comment on what it feels like to shave one’s balls…so I don’t.

I shave. It’s cleaner (no messy period blood stuck in the hairs), softer, and more sensitive…and more comfortable. I’ve lost count as to how many times I’ve walked around with a full bush and it knots up painfully.

I’ve seen myself trimmed (sort of) when I get a little lazy with the regular shaving and it grows in for a couple of weeks. It looks bad on me…so away the hair goes.

I don’t expect any women to change for me. Whether full bush, trimmed, or bare it’s all good to me. I’m the way I am because I know what I like for my own body.

November 10, 2009 at 3:24 pm
(28) Kim says:

um well technically a man can be a lesbian if he is a transgendered man attracted to women. lol have you ever seen Better Than Chocolate?

January 14, 2010 at 7:12 pm
(29) Karis says:

Natural! I am natural, i hate all this new shaving business, its unattractive to me and i dont like women to look like little girls. Why have women grown to hate their own natural bodies nowadays?
Its a shame. Women should be proud of the way they look. Trimming is fine if thats what you want but i personally think that having that delicious triangle of fur is SEXY! Nothing makes me want to go down on a woman more than parting her bush and… well i dont think its fair to be explicit.
Im almost 20 but i think natural ladies are so pretty. Its just gorgeous.
Love your bodies however you want, but thats my opinion.

January 31, 2010 at 8:04 pm
(30) Andie says:

Here’s an issue that’s bound to stir up the kind of lesbian self-righteousness that I’ve struggled with since coming out. I shave, I wear cosmetics, I dress fashionably, and I get my hair and nails done. Okay, so those are all “personal preferences.” It’s my choice. My current girlfriend doesn’t shave. She cuts her own hair (very, very poorly), she doesn’t own a decent pair of shoes, and she carries her money and credit cards in a cheap velcro wallet (which she carries in her back pocket). I guess those are all “personal preferences.” My friends in hetero. relationships all talk about the sacrifices or compromises that they make for their partners. They wax because their boyfriend likes it; the boyfriend shaves because she likes it. But in the LGTB community I just find that there’s this horrible stubborn refusal to do anything that clashes with this idea of personal preference. My girlfriend hates wearing dresses or anything “dressy.” Well, my brother got married last year and she wanted to go in Converse runners, jeans, and a Polo shirt. She does not own a dress, and she refuses even to try on one of mine. Yet she’ll buy all of her clothes in the men’s department of Salvation Army-type stores–as if jeans and t-shirts aren’t gendered. That’s her personal preference. If your partner wants you to do something that won’t hurt you and won’t in any way affect your life, why not try it for them? Why be so obstinate and caught up in how pubic hair’s natural, and a preference? Underarm hair is also natural, and, frankly, as a woman and as a lesbian, I find it revolting on all women. Even if I didn’t, and my partner asked me to shave my underarms, I’d do it. It’s not even a sacrifice, it’s just the ability to co-exist in a relationship.

April 15, 2010 at 1:12 pm
(31) jon says:

Well I’m a man and I shave down there too, well I epilate actually cos it gives better results. It looks nicer and feels nicer and it’s just more sensual.

And yes shame on me, I was reading this blog for all the reasons you think

July 7, 2010 at 4:17 am
(32) Bridget says:

I used to competetively swim for years, and started shaving just the bikini area because it makes you quicker in the water. Years after quitting the team I still shave just to stay clean, but not bald. I’m honestly just too lazy to shave it all, and too self-conscious to go natural. The women I’ve been with all trim, but I wouldn’t mind if they didn’t. I’m not too picky when it comes to a woman’s bush. My only goal down there is to please them, not me ;)

August 14, 2010 at 1:07 pm
(33) Teresa says:

All of this is super fascinating to me. I am a 26 year old female that recently got out of a 4.5 year lesbian relationship (my first) …. and will most likely pursue the ladies in the future :) lol….
one thing I was considering…also because of being an athlete, and also not wanting to have to deal with waxing come summertime @ the beach…was laser hair removal. I’ve heard of people doing it, but not ‘down there.’….it is available, but wondering what others’ opinions were on the thought. And if it is a good idea…exactly how much to be permanently removed?

August 16, 2010 at 8:21 am
(34) Ann says:

Hi, I’m glad someone else has asked this question (to shave or not to shave), as I’ve been wondering the very same thing.

I’m 26 year old lesbian but have never had relations with a woman. I’ve just recently come out to a friend, and I think now is the time to start to finding someone. Up until now, my sexuality was strictly my own knowledge.

Anyway, I digress, I have a question to add: many people are talking about ‘trimming’ as an alternative to shaving completely bald. But, what kind of length are people referring to? I know that sounds like a stupid question, but I just don’t know how I should be.

August 24, 2010 at 9:55 am
(35) Sarah says:

Hi Ann. I think what people mean is to trim the longer hairs a bit shorter. I personally do that and wax the edges so it looks a bit smaller and neater. Sorry if that’s TMI!

I think when you sleep with someone for the first time you are not always going to know exactly what they like. Be neat so that you feel confident, just like you would wear a nice outfit on a date. And good luck Ann ;)

September 21, 2010 at 10:46 pm
(36) martita says:

Reading comments that people find pubic hair “revolting” shows a negative judgement of what is acceptable..dirty is revolting…hair is a personal preference. It’s so childish/ cliquish to call the women with full pubic hair..the granola crowd,..please…

October 19, 2010 at 11:39 pm
(37) Dango says:

I shave, but not entirely. Although I’m not particularly opposed to it, I think being completely hairless gives a bit of that creepy/juvenile vibe.

Also, as a side note to the women on here such as “Dr. Catherine” who seem to think it’s so offensive that an educated man made a perfectly acceptable, respectful, legitimate comment…. If you don’t want men reading what you think — don’t write it on the internet!!! Seriously? This isn’t rocket science, ladies.
With the way so much information has shifted to being shared on the internet, I think it’s perfectly acceptable for someone to do some informal research on the internet. He’s not some creeping pervert, he’s been studying of over 50 years… and even if that was all one giant lie, who cares? It’s the INTERNET.
It frustrates me so much when man-hating lesbians have to be so completely rude to men at every turn. I love men, and most of my friends are men — gay or straight. Women like that make the rest of us normal human beings look bad.

January 8, 2011 at 5:26 pm
(38) EK says:

I agree with martita (#36) about disliking the strong denunciations of full pubic hair (and leg hair and underarm hair, for that matter).

How ironic that I–a woman who has always loved women but whose only relationship has been with a man–have found total love and acceptance of my body hair with a male sexual partner, but that potential female partners would reject me because of it.

It’s hurtful to me to read that my hair makes me revolting and somehow less hygienic (really? are men with body hair unclean too)? And it really puts me off seeking a sexual connection with women. I have heard that women are trained to be more judgemental of each other’s bodies than men are, and I guess that it is a downside with entering the lesbian dating scene.

Even though I have spent my life wanting to come out and be with women, I am afraid of running up against this type of negative judgment. I don’t want potential partners to think I’m revolting, but I’m also not willing to give up something that gives me pleasure in my own body (I like the touch and feel of my hair and the way it captures scent and moisture).

Can some of the women here who have been out for a while shed some light on how to suss out a potential partner’s views on hair? Should I just come right out and ask what they like during a casual conversation?

January 24, 2011 at 9:47 pm
(39) ruby moon says:

I am glad Dr. Gerughty posted on here. I don’t think people need to be excluded. I am a straight woman, but really wanted to know what other women did with their pubic hair. I get a brazilian wax every month. Most of my friends do not, so I was wondering what other women do. It makes me feel sexy and I think that makes me more sexy. My husband is happy with my vagina with or without hair.

February 24, 2011 at 5:40 am
(40) isobel says:

this blog has been so helpful to me! i’m 18 years old and about to have my first full sexual experience with another girl, well, hopefully tomorrow night! i was quite nervous about not knowing what to do about my hair, but in reading everyone’s responses i think the best thing for me to do is trim and maybe work up the courage to shave after i know more about what she likes. i’ve shaved before, but i always get this strange bristly feeling down there, like it’s never completely gone even when i’m thorough about it. anyway, i’m so excited and i really want everything to be perfect, but i guess there’s really no way of ensuring perfection.

March 6, 2011 at 11:05 am
(41) Claire says:

I really can’t get around this public hair issue,and some negative thoughts about it,it isn’t unheathy or dirty,there isn’t a wrong or right way how you should keep yourself between your legs,do what ever you feel comfortable,and you only,it’s pretty low minded of a person to be who expects her partner to be hairy/shaven/trimmed..etc…i’m bushy down there only trimming a little i like my pubic hair,and i belive pubic hair can play apart in love making,my partner is shaven only because her pubic hair is very sparse.

March 16, 2011 at 1:28 pm
(42) Mika says:

I am a 30 year old lesbian and personally I shave/trim around my bits and some times the whole bush depending on my mood. Like some others have mentioned my wife and I also shave/trim each other as part of our sexual experience when the mood hits us. Any way I was mostly posting because no one else has said to just do what you normally do down there. In other words just be yourself groom your bits the way you usually do and if she doesn’t like it either forget her or if your willing to experiment with her then by all means try something different. Trust me you will be doing a lot new things since your out. Good luck!

June 28, 2011 at 6:47 pm
(43) Jessica says:

Well I shaved bald twice in my whole entire life the first time it hurt so bad wen it grew back and the 2nd time is now I’m dreading the regrowth so I’m debating whether to keep it bald I like natural better but I’m afraid my future partners won’t :(

August 18, 2011 at 8:08 am
(44) Carina says:

This discussion makes me really sad. Pubes and female body hair is NOT unhygienic. It’s f**ked up that shaving is optional for a man but seen as mandatory for a woman. OP, it’s a question of what YOU prefer, and I don’t think you should consider trimming at all *before* you’ve even had sex! All you need to do before oral is keep clean down there.

If your partner demands you to trim, you dump them. In an instant. Men may have a disdain for natural womens’ bodies, but in the lesbian scene it’s a lot easier to find women who LIKE chicks to go au naturel – contrary to what you might think after reading this thread.

Here’s how it is: the more you trim, the thicker your body hair gets when it grows out, which means that the more often you trim the more naturally hairy you will be. Since pubes grow inwards (into your vajayjay) once you start trimming it’s like a vicious circle for life. So don’t let anybody else make that decision for you.

September 11, 2011 at 12:50 am
(45) katy says:

I don’t shave my pubic hair, neither does my girlfriend. In fact, my GF doesn’t doesn’t shave anything, not her legs nor her armpits. People don’t run away screaming from her…its just hair. I love her for more for recognizing when something is bullshit, and refusing the follow the masses.

The sad truth is that women have been duped into shaving since the beginning of the 20th century by men…manufacturers of razors. Its called “creating demand” in the marketing world and its brilliant. Dupe women into believing they have a problem and provide a fix…at a cost of course. Shame them, make them feel there is something very wrong with their bodies. Its a familiar story on so many levels. Now, women themselves are the most stringent enforcers of this unspoken social law of shaving.

Something to think about: female circumcision (mutilation) has, thank god, become illegal in some middle eastern countries. Do you know what has happened as a result? Women, often teenagers, are performing this mutilation on themselves and on their friends at their friends insistence. They want this done to them. They want to be “normal” and have no labia, no clit. To have external sex organs is “disgusting” to them, as their natural bodies are ugly to themselves, to their partners, and to society.

To change the natural state of your body is not something that should be promoted by society– especially not by women themselves, and double especially not by lesbians.

November 21, 2011 at 6:39 pm
(46) BlueFae says:

I just wanted to say thank you for everyone’s posts on this.

I am also engaged in my first (that actually counts) lesbian relationship and this has been a very pressing question on my mind as of late, seeing how me and my girlfriend haven’t really gotten to the more intimate stages of our relationship yet. Be this due to the early stages of a relationship, her only recently coming to terms with her sexuality or just our naivete and young ages.

Everyone’s posts and comments on this question have been extremely insightful and have helped me a lot in my nerves of breaching a more intimate relationship with my girlfriend.

Apologies if this is counted as spam for not technically answering the question of this poll but I just really needed to express my gratitude. Thank you!

April 7, 2012 at 12:50 pm
(47) Joanna says:

This is something that would never of crossed my mind untill i met my currant partner she introduced me into another world of being shaved/waxed she so happens to own a waxing sallon ,before i trimmed a liitle,now i’m fully waxed most of the time..it’s your hair you do what you want..like other posts if your partner expects you to shave dump them.

May 6, 2012 at 2:59 am
(48) Criostalé says:

I’m a lesbian, I’m 19, and I trim. I personally do not mind any sort of body hair. A woman comfortable with her body, no matter what it looks like, is sexy. Confidence is sexy. If you trim, cool. If you shave, cool. If you go natural, cool. You are beautiful, no matter how you look or your preference. But I personally enjoy a little bodily hair. Shows confidence.

June 20, 2012 at 5:58 am
(49) Debbie says:

What I can’t understand is why a girl who shaves her pubic is deemed cleaner than a girl who doesn’t,i don’t shave neither does my partner we shower every,where did this ridiculous idea of pubic hair is dirty come from?

July 1, 2012 at 11:57 am
(50) Lolo says:

I wear dresses, nail polish, accessories and hats.. However I consider shaving my pubic hair as abnormal as shaving my long lush hair on my head.. Do I need to be perceived as more hygienic by shaving my head/pubic hair? What kind of concept is that?! Soap travels to all parts of my body….Bald pubic hair originates from the society sick fixation on youth. To me there is nothing attractive about plasticky looking little girl vulva. Similarly abnormal as silicon bags attached to the female chest cavity.. Nowadays butt implants are all the rage. Hello! Female slim toned vegan clean fresh natural body needs no futher enhancements… Perhaps a nice hat over the long shiny hair.. Pure poetry

July 17, 2012 at 8:12 pm
(51) Ast says:

Well here we go, this “debate” again. It really frustrates me that there sort of seems to be an ignorance to pubic hair in the world we live in now.
I’m 20 years old and have been in a lesbian relationship for two years, this is also my only intimate relationship and the first time we had sex, I doubt she nor I were thinking “I wonder what her pubic area is like”. I also used to dress in men’s clothes to look more butch.
My girlfriend and I have grown up a lot since then and I guess I grew into what I realized I wanted to be, a gay girl who looks straight. Now if I had gone through the same transition of who I was with a man, I would have taken ALL my fuzz off long ago, but I find that because I’m with a woman, who has the same bits (derr Astrid haha) as me, she will learn to accept that I like my pubes.
She actually liked them in the first place but still…

September 24, 2012 at 5:24 am
(52) L.C. says:

@Lolo (50): “Bald pubic hair originates from the society sick fixation on youth. To me there is nothing attractive about plasticky looking little girl vulva.”
Right on!! I do agree that it is all personal preference but to all the people that insult body hair… Really?! So having hair makes one gross? Wow… I would prefer at least SOME hair (and see nothing wrong with a full bush). Bald, however, makes me feel like I’m with someone who has yet to hit puberty.. O.o no thanks!
I’m 23 and have been bald, and would actually prefer natural to that. Though usually I trim or give myself a landing strip if I have the time. lol

November 28, 2012 at 6:49 am
(53) Eva says:

When I’ve been intimate with other woman they have mostly been fully shaved or waxed. In at least one of those relationships, as much as we agreed that it was our bodies to do with as we pleased, we shaved each other regularly and according what turned on the other.

Sometimes she liked me totally bushy just for a change and at other times she’d shave only around all of my openings or take everything off. Most of the time we settled for shaving each other as a relaxed type of fun on a lazy afternoon but also as a highly sexually intimate type of foreplay. I don’t think tho’ that I’ve ever shaved a lover or been shaved by her without a having a good f*** and the big O afterwards.

Mostly we left our pubic mounds rather bushy and then shaved off ALL of the rest and right around to the back. Shaving another woman is a huge turn-on for me and I just looove being shaved by partners. Introducing a new lover to shaving it all off is a rare treat when it has happened

Unless I feel like i know my partner quite well I prefer to see her with some hair on her mound during our early encounters, but with all of the rest freshly smooth. For me to be fully shaved on the very first time we get naked is not my style. If we see each other after that then I’ll consider baring absolutely everything and letting her shave me everywhere.

December 23, 2012 at 3:51 pm
(54) Lydia says:

Hmm..this age old subject, i guess it’ll prop up time and time again, but I feel in todays society women whether lesbain/bi/or straight are expected to be totally hairless or have very little pubic hair, could this be a factor of the porn industry?…media?…cosmetic companies?..who knows but it has gone to far,pubic hair “IS NOT!” dirty or unhealthy, if I’m in a relationship it’s because I want too be with that person and not on the amount of hair she has between her legs what ever she has its who they are I wouldn’t want them to chahge,in one of your posts it states theres no right way or wrong way on how you should keep your pubic hair which is correct do what you feel comfortable with,I too believe pubic hair can play apart in love making. my preference on my own pubic hair changes from a full bush or partly shaved where just my labia is shaved/waxed.

February 16, 2013 at 12:04 am
(55) Sam says:

Personally, I don’t shave down there at all. I have my own reasons. I really don’t mind hair down there on my partners. It’s just hair after all, and I don’t think that anyone should change the natural state of their body in order to please anyone else-it should be all about PERSONAL PREFERENCE. First of all, it’s a hassle to shave down there! It’s itchy and unnatural to me, and it’s too expensive and painful to regularly wax. Second, who cares? It’s down there for a reason. Why should I get rid of it?

April 8, 2013 at 12:24 am
(56) C. Rod says:

I understand this blog is somewhat old but believe the info is still relevant now a day; I am a 27 y/o lesbian. I don’t wax or shave because: #1: personal preference. I’m not a kid nor do I intend to look like one. #2: I am too lazy. #3: painfull ingrown hair simply doesn’t make it worth the time and effort.

That being said… The whole shaving / waxing thing originated out of the porn industry. They found bald would both make the guy’s genitalia look bigger & more appealing; and would also allow better view / access to the women’s vulva.

I personally don’t like bald women because: #1 I like woman not girls. #2 smell and taste to a woman that has at least a little hair is far better than those that do bald #3: “bald” is awful to go down on unless they’re really shaved smooth. Usually feels more like going down on sandpaper. #4: body hair rises perception of certain body parts making it more erotic.

I’ve only dated one woman that liked bald on both parties so I complied but seeing his terribly painful it was to me she begged me to stop.

I also had a 6+ yr relationship – Initially she didn’t even trim (which wasn’t a problem to me since I find hair in women EXTREMELY erotic) and then she started trimming. She knew about my shaving issue and never even suggested it since body hair wasn’t an issue for her either… I always trim. With time she started shaving due to the increased sensations during love making but never kept this a regular…. She would also sometimes refrain from shaving legs or armpits for somewhat extended periods and so would I… Even when I don’t think she found it as erotic and arousing as I did she also thought it was a personal choice and I also think that in a society controlled by the media it is also a matter of the amount of trust and intimacy you have with your significant other…. Just my thoughts.

September 25, 2013 at 3:34 am
(57) Leah says:

I never had much pubic hair to begin with, but I shave because I like how soft the skin under the hair feels. I don’t have to worry about when to shave as I’ve never had a period yet and I’m 32.

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