I have Feelings for my Best Friend
I am a straight girl and have a really good friend who is gay that I recently reconnected with. We hang out constantly, almost everyday. In the beginning I thought she had a crush on me and after we started hanging out everyone started asking if we were dating and said we had a connection and stuff like that. Everyone thinks I'm gay because I am kind of a tomboy.Slowly I started getting feelings for her. We have an odd relationship where we joke about it all the time. When she broke up with her girlfriend I spent an entire week at her place. When we sleep in the same bed we always end up touching somehow and sometimes we spoon.
I Tell Her How I Feel
Finally I told her I had feelings and she said she would never date a straight girl and she thinks I’m not gay. Then she told me she isn't over her old girlfriend and she can't have feelings for two people at one time.I don’t believe she is telling the truth. However she said she just wants to be friends but every time she is with someone else it makes me jealous and I resent when other people take her attention away from me. I am not sure if I am at all gay. I have never felt anything for another girl and I go to gay bars with her all the time.
I think it’s possible to just like the person and not have to associate with being gay or straight. Do you think she is lying because she doesn't want to get hurt? I don't know what to think and am confused. Any opinions would help.
It sounds to me like your friend is playing games with you. If I were you, I would distance myself from your friend until you get over your feelings for her. It will only end bad if you stick around and torture yourself. Maybe the time apart will also get your friend to realize what she is missing. Good Luck. I hope it works out either way.
Ever heard the phrase, “she’s just not that into you?” Personally, I think this phrase applies to this situation you are facing.
I’ve not only been where you are right now, but I’ve also been in your friends’ shoes. It’s not easy to be in either position. Feelings are involved, and while no one wants to get hurt, it comes down to a matter of inevitablity. Someone is probably going to get hurt, and I’m afraid it’s most likely going to be you.
If your friend was having feelings for you, she would probably let you know in one way or another. Women are built from passion.
Though you didn’t know the outcome of telling her you were starting to have feelings for her when you did, it’s made her somewhat uncomfortable. It’s a alot easier for a lesbian to tell a friend she’s not really sexually interested in that she’s having issues with x, y, or z. Excuses are easy to make.
The spooning and touching aspects of this tell me she feels comfortable with you physically, but she’s not ready to make a leap into any sort of sexual engagement.
If you two were meant to be together at any point, it will happen.
However, be prepared to just stay her friend so you don’t set yourself up for a broken heart.
I had this same confused feelings for my best friend. She did not understand and ended up not talking to me for 5 years.The brake up was very painful and would not wist that on anyone. Sounds like this friend don’t understand as well. Your feelings will lead you to another person.I had found my true love and friend.This time let your heart find her and not your eyes.
Hi. I think you not necessarily have to be gay to like a person of the same sex. I am straight – yes straight. I was always attracted to guys. I had this good friend – we became very close and at one point in time we needed love and support which we gave to each other. One day during those low moments -one thing led to another and we ended up in a relationship. We were torn apart – because we were both straight and still are but yet we were drawn to each other – the intensity so electrifying it was so difficult to keep our hands off each other. We were both filled with guilt but we decided to ignore and give way to passion but finally one fine day we decided that NO, this is just not what we want in life, we are STRAIGHT and we have to stop this. And we did. It was very difficult but we did it. We are still very close – very touchy – etc but in a harmless way.
So if your friend is just not interested, just leave it and go on with your life, ignore the jealousy, meet new friends and hopefully you will meet the love of your life – man or woman. Don’t analyze yourself to see whether you are straight or gay – just let loose and go on because there’s no answer to many of life’s problems – searching for answers all the time makes one rather confused and edgy. Seek God and enjoy life.