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The Ultimate Lesbian Short Film Festival

Intrigue! Fantasy! Suspense! Sex!

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The Ultimate Lesbian Short Film Festival
Wolfevideo.com
  • “10 short films full of INTRIGUE! FANTASY! SUSPENSE! And, of course, SEX!”
  • Wolfe Video, 2006
  • English Language
  • 108 Minutes
  • The Ultimate?

    I’m always wary of film titles that begin with “The Ultimate blah blah.” Makes me go, “Hmmm…Can you whip out a thesaurus and try a little harder?” Anyway, my bitchy snobbishness aside, although The Ultimate Lesbian Short Film Festival was not the ultimate visual experience for me, I did find several hot gems worth watching.

    Run. Don’t walk.

    I do love lesbian shorts—those mini glimpses into lesbian lives. I’m fascinated by what a director and editor can do with such brevity, what stories can be woven, what impact can be felt.

    High Five Recommendations

    Special Ops Media
    I digress. My wife, “The Director”, is screaming, “Focus.” Like me, these films are a bit out of focus. There doesn’t seem to be a common theme or thread. Not that there needs to be, but I find it much more appealing. Definitely helps my addled, overly caffeinated brain. (Filmmakers, hint hint.)

    There are ten short films in total and they range in genre and description from comedy, drama, horror, to just plain “what were you thinking?” weird. (Now, girls, aren’t we over the “beyond bizarre” lesbian films of yesteryear? We are in the Millennium, you know.) Of the ten, I highly recommend the following:

    Highly Recommend Lesbian Short Films

    1)Blow
    Directed by Marie Craven (7 mins., Australia). In this hilarious comedy, a young girl (and a redhead, no less) realizes that her sneezing fits are tied to her budding lesbianism. Let’s just say she no longer needs a tissue once she kisses her crush.

    2)A Woman Reported
    Directed by Chris J. Russo (5 mins., USA). Moira Kelly (remember her from The Cutting Edge or With Honors? Am I dating myself?) stars in this terrifying thriller about the moments that occur just before a heinous lesbian related hate crime. Warning: This one kept me up at night, though good excuse for a two a.m. cuddle.

    3) Transit
    Directed by Kerry Weldon (4 mins., USA). How I wish I had had subway experiences like this when I lived in NYC! Would have made the commute a whole helluva lot better. During a late night train ride, a woman locks eyes with a captivating fellow passenger. Will she change her route? Follow her attraction? (Yea, any time I locked eyes with a stranger, I got “DYKE!”, “Jesus Loves You,” or ”Got Change?” What line was she on? Oh, right, this is fictional, a romantic fantasy.)

    Special Ops Media

    4) Half Laughing
    Directed by Michelle Ehlen (12 mins., USA). Prepare yourself, we have a weeper. A butch lesbian returns home for a family funeral. She is greeted by her homophobic, appearance driven mother who wants her to be someone she is not; i.e., straight and feminine and a mirror image. Where is PFLAG when you need them? There ought to be a gay superperson who can intervene in situations like these, calm everyone down, spread the love and good karmic understanding. (Note: Short film opportunity.)

    5) Everything Good
    Directed by Elizabeth McCarthy (17 mins., USA). Set in Amsterdam…do I really need to share more?...An American woman traveling alone orders up some sexual healing to alleviate the lesbian bed death she has been suffering at home. Not your typical tourist activity.

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